A Very Coco Christmas: A Coco Pinchard Christmas novella by Robert Bryndza

Author:Robert Bryndza [Bryndza, Robert]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Team Bryndza Books
Published: 2015-06-02T23:00:00+00:00

Wednesday 25th December - Christmas Day

When I stormed out of the living room last night, I was expecting Mum to follow me upstairs and let me have it, but she didn’t. I waited in my room, then I got undressed and lay in bed, but she didn’t make an appearance.

This was worrying. She’s gone bonkers over far less, like the time I told my friend at school Mum secretly watches Coronation Street with the curtains drawn. She screamed at me about that one for days.

Now, I’d sprung my working class boyfriend and his family on her for Christmas lunch and she was accepting it. Or was she? What did she have planned for me?

When I woke this morning, I quickly got dressed and then poked my head out of my bedroom door. I could smell bacon frying and Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree was playing on the radio in the kitchen.

I padded downstairs and, taking a deep breath, went through the swing door into the kitchen. The table was set with a cloth and cutlery and Dad was sitting at the table with a cup of coffee. Mum was artfully arranging bacon and egg on plates.

‘Morning,’ I said.

‘Merry Christmas,’ said Mum bringing plates over to the table. She leant in and kissed me on the cheek.

‘Merry Christmas Dad,’ I said sitting down, confused.

‘Merry Christmas Coco,’ he said with a grin. We started to eat in silence.

‘So, this Daniel chap,’ said Dad. ‘Why on earth does he call you Coco?’

‘It’s silly,’ I said.

‘It’s not some sort of lovey-dovey pet name, is it?’ asked Mum trying to hide her revulsion.

‘NO!’ I said feeling myself go red with horror that they might think I was doing what I actually have done, quite a few times.

‘On my first night at Aberystwyth the students’ union organised a pub quiz and a raffle, and I won a bottle of Coco Chanel No.5 perfume. Daniel couldn’t remember my name so I became the Coco girl, and then everyone started calling me Coco. I like it.’

‘So it’s a nickname?’ said Dad.

‘Yes.’

‘Well, Happy Christmas Coco… At least you chose a respectable brand of perfume.’

‘That’s true. What if it had been Charlie!’

Dad laughed and Mum tried to, which made her look like a snake about to unhinge its jaw.

‘Look, Mum, why are you being so calm?’ I asked, warily. Mum composed her face into a smile.

‘Because I’ve realised something darling,’ she said. ‘These people will descend on us for lunch and they’ll prove my point that they’re not suitable. It won’t be nice but I’m willing to go through it all to get this boy out of your system.’

‘I’m serious about Daniel,’ I said.

‘I know you are,’ smiled Mum patronisingly. ‘And despite what you think I won’t enjoy seeing you heartbroken.’

She seemed so sure of herself, so confident.

‘I’ve already telephoned Yvonne and Adrian, I’ve warned them what to expect.’

‘You’ve never met Daniel’s family!’

‘I have a good idea. Now you’ll be able to see Daniel and Kenneth side by side and you’ll realise just what I see, Kenneth is a catch, and very eligible.

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